Sunday, August 29, 2004

sup sup Miz Gerry

so I straight up plucked a miz gerry friday, easy as pie! kind of a critter, all drunked and crunked, ain't gonna be tellin, plus I boosted fifty bucks outta her purse when she was crappin or whatever it is old ladyz do after they get with Tha Nephew. just to make sure she ain't gonna be back next week I leaned out the window and threw all her underpants at her as she was leavin through tha crowd. skunked, crunked, punked. LN took a brew shine and brought the green gurgles to a nasty xbox session of Soul Duster.

Friday, August 27, 2004

screw those fools

man ain't leapfrog or nobody budged since they edged me outta the buxx. some kind of pricks, tha oracle's dad probably taught them how to out-prick everybody, that's all he does all day at Oracle for a living. I think his job is to like pour acid on other companies. dick. kumar im'd me but I don't wanna hang out with his pussy ass tonight and play pictionary so I'm just gonna cool it around here, maybe pick up on tha Miz gerries or lift a few wallets. it's a dog weekend.

Monday, August 23, 2004

leapfrog is hell of a cock, yo!

leapfrog is hell of a cock, yo! he ain't givin me any cut of the revenues, since accordin to him he and tha oracle and nicky did all the work and I didn't do nothin. bull-honkey! I straight up thought up the logo, which is some tits comin' out of a computer monitor, plus who sprung for all that pizza on the big launch night?!

I tried to hack the website but all I could do was make the browser list all the files in a directory. man, I don't know how to hack. do I gotta get all DOS prompt?

Wednesday, August 18, 2004

tha buxxmaker

this site is bankin it in yo! we finally got all the categories cooked up and already we got like 500 subscribes, just on day 1. check it, don't wreck it:

categories at our website
1. leapfrog's uncle shittin on things
2. burned up bodies
3. naked army chicks in the shower
4. exploded bodies
5. run over bodies
6. misc

you gotta have a misc when you're doin somethin like this. some crazy shit goes down in wartime, and you can't make a whole category for a single jpg of leapfrog's uncle jumping a motorcycle into a lake.

Tuesday, August 17, 2004


tha oracle set us all up in some fat ISP account that his dad gets thru Oracle and since nicky did a triple last summer in web design he arranged all the photos and stuff. There was a ton of nasty action on that camera and we had to really put our brains together thinking of how to organize all of it. like there was this one fifteen-shot sequence of leapfrog's uncle trying to take a shit on a quarter, and that should all go in its own category obviously, but what about when his uncle's takin a shit on stuff that ain't money? web design is a hard gig, yo. pease to the brothers that keep amazon in buttons and drop-downs.

Monday, August 16, 2004


leapfrog's uncle is in the marines or whatever and we boosted his digital camera outta his bag when he got back from iraq! he was in the kitchen eatin ham and rolls with the fam while we duped the jpgs. just the nastiest, photos of a dude all burned up with just teeth showing, a murdered head sitting by a log with one open white eye, even one of his uncle taking a shit behind a tank! we're gonna start a website, there are over 500 pics on this camera! hello benjamins

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

Squeeze squeezes

uncle ray has this big old wooden crate of LPs that I plunder when I need some new vinyl to scratch over at tha oracle's. dude has a wicked setup in his room and a soundproof door, yo, so we scratch at all hours. this time I found vintage Beastie Boys wax that gave up some sick samples and breakdowns, and we cribbed mad material from this old Puff Daddy album. I also grabbed one by some band called Squeeze, just the gayest, and threw it straight at a rock on the way home. Squeeze a nerd and get a turd, word.

Monday, August 09, 2004


oh man we jackassed it all day with tha oracle's new video camera! first knicknack ate a whole chocolate cake and drank a carton of milk and we rolled him down a grass hill at the park. he did a couple little pukes and then spewed a gusher down the slide! some moms was pissed off so we took to kumar's place. we had kumar put a turtleneck on, but just around his neck, and we pulled the rest of it over his head and put in like fifty eggs. then we took turns hittin him with a wiffle ball bat. yolks was leakin everywhere! later on after terence's dad passes out six of us are gonna piss on him in a move we're callin the Six Pouches. watch your noggins, kenny loggins.

Thursday, August 05, 2004

school eats tha wad

aw man, school is startin again and that eatzz tha wad. only consolation is that I be pullin up to the b-sides every day in the halls, all with my bonito. we ain't wearin backpacks this year we decided, we're carryin briefcases, straight up handcuffed to our wrists! mad style, a drop of sweat on the teacher's brow as they silently freak out. touch a creek, freak!

Monday, August 02, 2004


cory's uncle broke his neck! he was ridin' on his ATV and pretty hooleyed, and he got thrown and his neck just snapped! we were freakin out! helicopters came and took him away and cory was crying all over the place. they say his uncle can't walk any more or use his arms, like that metallica video. that is so ill. I am shook, so read a book, crook.